Musings from an Orthodox Jewish work at home mom of twins with Autism Spectrum Disorders.

Most moms worry a bit about second grade starting— they worry about whether their kids have all their supplies, whether they’ll eat their lunch— whether they’ll like their new teachers.

Me?  I worry that my enco kid will poop at school.  We’d BEEN on a straight after dinner schedule for a while but over the past few days that’s gone out the window (perhaps since school is starting?).  I gave up on underpants here at home—-  my 7 year old pooped herself maybe 6 times yesterday (lost count) and 3-4 times today.  The once a day after dinner poop doesn’t concern me vis a vis school…. but this new schedule is worrisome.  She’ll have the same aide as last year who will help her change, force her to get the rest in the toilet, deal with the meltdown, etc….. but as years go by it’s more and more heartbreaking.  I hope I sent enough underpants changes.

I worry that my other kid will get enough bathroom reminders— if he’s not TOLD to pee, he’ll happily wet himself.  I worry that he’ll spend 95% of the day screaming his head off.  I worry that he’ll continue to ignore everyone at recess and count the woodchips or line up trash he finds on the ground.  I worry about meeting strange kids at the library again and again who tell me “oh, your son goes to ___ school.  He’s the one who screams all the time!”

Academics?  Not worried.  Social skills, behavior, and toileting?  Very worried.


Comments on: "First Day of Second Grade Tomorrow" (4)

  1. ((((((((((((((((((((((((((BIG HUGS))))))))))))))))

  2. One of the issues with beginning potty training late is that it means
    a possibility of your child using diapers even when in school.

    remember queing at the bank and watching parents with boys exasperated,.
    When your daughter is ready to toilet train, the process will
    be shorter and more relaxed for both of you.

  3. I just read your post. I wanted to tell you about what happened to my daughter in hopes it might help you. We went through a very similar stage with my daughter. It was so bad I had to leave work 3-4 times a day just to get her through one day of school. Her pediatrician kept telling us to use laxatives which either didn’t work or would cause explosive diarreah during the day. I demanded a referral to a pediatric psychiatrist. He was like well there has been some recent studies on using Zoloft to treat encopresis. I said I’ll try anything! Three days on the pill and it was all gone. NOT kidding. She came home everyday and said mommy this has been the best day of my life! Sadly that was three years ago and everytime we try and take her off it the accidents start happening again. But it’s worth looking into. I know your frustration and utter helplessness. Please see a pediatric psychiatrist. Wish you luck! If you have any more questions you can email me at

  4. Sabrina, that’s really helpful, thank you! She’s already on abilify and adderral but I wonder if we might be able to wean down from abilify and give zoloft a try. Her twin brother did horribly on zoloft and is doing better on risperdal, but he doesn’t have enco— for him, we were trying to control anxiety/ aggression. Worth some thought— THANK YOU!

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