Musings from an Orthodox Jewish work at home mom of twins with Autism Spectrum Disorders.

Archive for the ‘Third Grade’ Category

Pharmacy Hour

Some nights I just want to chuck the risperdal, vitamin D, multivitamins, probiotics, fish oil, geodon, adderall, colace, NAC, tenex (gotta crush that one of course), and last week benadryl (but no more albuterol because I was told maybe THAT caused more aggression) (Fred was sick- he’s fine now, but every time he gets a cold he gets R.A.D.) ………..out the window and just tell the kids to go to bed. There are families out there who don’t have pharmacy hour between exercise time and bedtime– amazing.

Med update:

risperdal—–  WAS working well for Fred.  Until now.  He’s now at the highest dosage and he’s been suspended from school 5 days out of the past 6 weeks.  Emergency IEP meeting—- I asked for a 1:1 aide.  Denied because “he has more good days than bad”.  I asked that they stop suspending him because you can’t suspend impulse control into a kid with autism.  Denied.  I asked for another FBA– got THAT rolling.

Vitamin D—- Wilma is low.  Duh, we’re in Ohio.  Why is Fred not low?

Geodon— working fairly well— she’s having a good year.  Today I was told at her anal manometry that they’ve not usually done manometries on kids on such strong anti-psychotics.  yeah, ok.

Adderall— working super well—- she always does homework nicely, and always sits through class well, needing just a few breaks per day.

Tenex— just added it for the finger picking and forehead picking…… she gets one pimple and spreads it into a little colony by picking and picking.  Fun times.  Tried tenex before and it did nothing, but that was years ago.

Suspension

Fred got suspended for reaching into a (male) student’s pants and underpants to touch him inappropriately.  Just in the past few weeks, he looked up inappropriate videos on the school computer, got suspended for violence, and now this thing that’s just……. *sigh*—– yeah it’s bad. The roller coaster of these kids and their issues is intense.  I cannot believe how FAR he went this time.

Suspended kid really feels suspension is a complete deterrent. (not) He was home without his sister. Even though I’m not taking him anywhere fun  (yup, he asked), and even though he doesn’t get to stim on the ipad/tv etc because I’m a mean mom who is making him play outside and draw, he’s pretty much in 7th heaven—- a house without Wilma. Want to give my kid a consequence that makes sense? Send him to Wilma’s school for the day and make him be with her all day long.

So tomorrow will be his third day of suspension in the past month.  School went straight to suspension, no stopping at FBA/BIP even though his last one was two years ago.  On the one hand, they need to show the other students/ parents that even though Fred has special needs he gets CONSEQUENCES for his actions.  On the other hand, suspension is not a deterrent.  If you ask him WHY he got suspended, he says “for screaming”.  ugh.  Emergency IEP meeting on the 26th.  I’ll be asking for a one on one aide.  Spoiler alert:  I’ll be told no.

Rabbi Twerski: Letters To My Children

I COULD and will, at some point, blog about the fact that Fred has been suspended three days in the past month (and had another major incident that didn’t lead to suspension), and that these incidents didn’t lead to a new FBA/BIP before suspension and that I’ve got an emergency IEP meeting coming where I’ll ask for a one on one aide for him (and likely be told no)…. but I’m truly not in the mood.  I wasn’t GOING to blog during this get ready for Pesach kind of week, but my 10:00 pm Sunday phone appointment got rescheduled for tomorrow, and the rest of the house is asleep, so……  I choose to blog about Rabbi Twerski.  I’ve been wanting to share snippets of my favorite books on this blog and bit by bit I will.

These snippets are from Rabbi Abraham J. Twerski, M.D.’s “Letters To My Children”.  Things I want to remember and refer back to.

The Incident of The Whirlpool: As a medical director of a psych hospital, Rabbi Twerski was on constant call.  He had a two week vacation and decided on Hot Springs, Arkansas— no sight-seeing, no adventures, just REST.  He got into a whirlpool bath, and sat for…. five minutes.  He was told that the treatment was twenty five minutes.  He could not tolerate the peace and quiet and being alone with himself for more than five minutes.  “In your whirlpool, you were deprived of all possible diversions.  There was nothing to read, nothing to watch, nothing to listen to, and no one to talk to.  Being stripped of all diversions, you were left in the immediate company of yourself.  You were alone in a tiny room with someone you don’t like very much.  No wonder you were miserable.”  (negative self worth)

“I have often said, only half in jest, that there are four essentials to human life:  1) food and water, 2) clothing, 3) shelter, and 4) someone to blame.”  (accepting responsibility)

“…The salesman saw that the peasant had put the suit on over his farmer’s clothes and said, ‘My friend, you have to take off your old clothes.  No suit will fit properly if you wear it on top of your old clothes.’  We might wonder why we have difficulty achieving an enduring simchah.  It is because we are trying to put it on top of our former concept of simchah.  …….. we may better understand simchah by contrasting it with its opposite.  the opposite of simchah is despair.”  (on simchah)

“R’ Samson Raphael Hirsch made an important observation.  R’ Hirsch, among others, contends that when two Hebrew words are similar, their meanings are somehow related.  The words samei’ach (happiness) and tzomei’ach (growth) are almost identical.  This means that simchah requires growth.  There is a seed of simchah within every person that can be developed into happiness, but like a delicate plant, it must be cared for and given adequate water and nutrition.  Only then can it sprout.” (on simchah)

His third grade teacher speaking with him years later….. “Then I said to your mother, ‘Mrs. Twerski, I was sure that you were going to reprimand me for putting Abraham in that play.’ Your mother said, ‘If what we have given him at home is not strong enough to resist the effects of a non-Jewish holiday play, then we have totally failed’.”  (on public school– resistance to non Jewish influences)

More to come— this is a great book.

I Spoke Too Soon

You all knew this was coming.  When I posted in June, things were going well.

The last four weeks of the twelve week long camp mommy?  well…..  it was basically a screamfest.  Before I even woke up most mornings, she’d take the ipad out of his hands (hello, we have two ipads, why fight over one?), he’d scream his head off and yup, she got bitten at least three times that I can recall offhand….. before I even opened my eyes.  They were sick of each other.  They needed school.  They needed to be away from each other.

Today was day two of school.  SO FAR SO GOOD.  And when they’re home after school they love each other again.  She tells him she missed him.  They hug each other.  From 4:00 to 8:00, all is right with the universe.  From 7:00 am to 8:00 pm, it’s not so simple.  But when they get the break, it’s a beautiful thing.

And me?  With my break I get to catch up on work and laundry and bill paying and organizing and cleaning and work and laundry and bill paying and organizing and cleaning and shopping……… well today I got my bottom braces put on (had only top ones until today- my upper jaw needed more expanding) and took a nice LONG nap— go me!!!

Tag Cloud